Top Five Games to Look Forward to in 2013

The start of a new year lends itself to many new comforts. Whether it’s the comfort of success that you could eat all that Christmas ham that everyone said you couldn’t, or perhaps the comfort of a cigarette after making a New Year’s Resolution to quit smoking only to break it a few hours later. Whatever your new year is bringing to you, nothing is more comforting to me than the prospect of this year in gaming releases. This new year has a lot to compete with, as the hangover from last year still drapes over my shoulders. Last year had a myriad of overwhelming releases on all modes of gaming as well as a new console with the Wii U.

Nothing is more comforting than the knowledge that this will be a good year in gaming. Therefore I have created a Top Five List of games to look forward to that will be sure to get you excited enough to write down their release dates and perhaps even fantasize about, in your spare time.

5: Grand Theft Auto 5

A continuation of a well loved series, Grand Theft Auto always manages to deliver a larger and more immersive game play. Returning to the fictional world of Los Santos the series is reimagining an area created for Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. Promising to deliver a huge open area world, the developers, Rockstar North, are injecting a relatively new concept to the series in the form of three playable protagonists.

If you aren’t familiar with the Grand Theft Auto games the story and themes usually revolve around committing crimes to further a single protagonists standing in world. In Grand Theft Auto IV you played Niko, a veteran of an Eastern European war, who is chasing the American dream and builds himself up from relative poverty. In San Andreas you play CJ who returns to his old hood after his mother’s death and starts to help rebuild his neighbourhood into a gangster’s paradise. Despite the often brutal underpinnings of the story and the criminal acts you commit, your playable character begs understanding and empathy and you never totally feel like the bad guy.

This game is definitely one to look forward to. With its immersive style and complex world you often spend most of your time in Grand Theft Auto games exploring the little things that make the game incredible. Like driving around looking for that perfect car to drive over that ramp you saw about half an hour ago, or going on a rampage that ends with an army tank. The game play demands captivation that can be really rare in modern gaming.  You spend hours playing the game than trying to finish it.

Release Date: March

4, 3:Watch_Dogs & The Last of Us

Watching last year’s E3 unfold was a potentially boring event. Most of the announcements and trailers were either old news or gave no news at all. Except for two game-play trailers that got my blood pumping. The first of those trailers was for Watch_Dogs the second was for The Last of Us.

Watch_Dogs just looked so damn fun while The Last of Us just seems so damn dark.

I’ve put these two together because based on their trailers; they both seemed to share the same game mechanics that make me anxious to see more. That mechanics being an immersive open world that seems to react and change based on how the player interacts with it.

Watch_Dogs focuses on the player’s unique ability to hack into electronic devices in the open world, utilising them to complete a number of tasks: the trailer features phones failing and causing distractions, gathering information from surrounding electronics, and hacking into a road light causing a traffic accident that the player then uses to kill his target and his bodyguards.

The Last of Us is a survival horror game that allows the player, coupled with an AI character, to explore an immense world where enemies respond uniquely to your own style of play. The trailer features a skirmish between the two protagonists and another group of survivors and while being ultraviolent in nature it also showcases how impressive the enemy AI is.

Both of these games want to offer that unique experience that comes with a world that responds to your every action. They want to recreate un-predictable reality.This is what will potentially make these games great. Gamers love that sense of freedom that comes with a unique gaming experience, an experience that, on the surface, doesn’t seem to be dictated by the rules of the game but by chance or your individual choices.

The only problem that I can foresee with these games is repetition. One of the problems I found with Skyrim was many of the quest that seem to arise organically merely degenerated into déjà vu as once again I would have to travel to some distant cave to fight the same Draugr over and over again. So much content and interactivity can lose the story or meaning in the process.

Release Dates: Watch_Dogs – Unconfirmed in 2013
The Last of Us – May 7th PS3 Exclusive

2: South Park The Stick of Truth

If you were born before or in my generation of gaming you might recognize this FPS.


You might not realize this but every South Park game that has ever existed was done with little development from the creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker.

For the first time these two are having a direct input into the development of the game and are maintaining creative control over the product, they even approached Obsidian with the concept: a 2-D RPG that combines a turn-based game-play with all the humour and wit of the South Park variety.

What gets me excited for these games are the trailers, the game looks hilarious; not just the game-play and dialogue but even the little things in the background that I didn’t notice the first time around. Genuinely funny games that maintain game-play are hard to come by. The game combines Final Fantasy with Paper Mario and still manages to seem epic.

What I want this game to represent is that classic party game. The one you pull out when everyone is really drunk or the party is beginning to wind down. Something like Super Smash Brothers or Mario Kart 64. While I haven’t been able to find much information, outside of speculation, on the multiplayer side of the game, it seems a logical introduction. There isn’t even a need for splitscreen in the way it is designed and it is this possibility of a party game that excites me the.

Release Date: March 5th

1:Total War: Rome II

Have you ever had that one game that consumes so much of your life that you when you are walking around you actually hear the background music? Well, I may have had more than one, but the first for me was Total War: Rome. A long time fan of Age of Empires, my first contact with Total War was like a dream come true. It was the game I dreamed of. With its complex battlefield mechanics combined with a turn-based strategy that delves into the economic structure of every province and set in one of my favorite parts of world history, Total War: Rome is the game I come back to every couple of months and still get that same sense of enjoyment from.

Now they want to take that game and make it better looking, add more content and add more mechanics. Seriously Creative Assembly, take all my money.

“‘Big’ would be the obvious word. “Enormous” is probably a slightly better one” Alec Meer, Eyes on with Total War: Rome II


Coupled with a new graphic engine which makes it possible to render tens-of-thousands of soldiers and buildings on a battlefield, the game will allow a played to focus on the macro-scale of the conflict or the micro-effects that ripple through the faces of individual men on the battlefield.

One of the only downfalls with the original Total War: Rome was the lack of naval combat, something that was addressed in later series of Total War, but will apparently be more user friendly in the upcoming release. The player will even be able to utilise both naval and land troops in a siege scenario.

Despite all this intense graphical detail the game will still be able to scale for slower computers or laptops, something that Total War: Rome managed to deliver as well.

Maybe there is some fan-boy part of me that hopes to recapture the gaming experience that I received throughout the first episode, but that knowledge doesn’t temper my excitement. Rome was a fantastic game, and throughout the rest of the Total War series they have consistently delivered a unique style of gaming. Basically, any military strategy game released this year will have a hard time competing, even if it doesn’t live up to my expectations.

Release Date: October

Well there it is my top five games to look forward to in the next year. Below this are three honourable mentions that, while being exciting game releases, were comparatively not as stirring. Be sure to look forward to them nonetheless. Your list is definitely going to be dramatically different than mine and you should leave a comment listing the game you can’t wait for.

Honourable Mentions:
Battlefield 4

Project Zomboid


Short Back and Sides


The first time Alexander had a haircut was the first time he had ever cum. His parents were a product of the sixties, all hair and freedom as long as you were in line with protocols created before you were born. Their constant need for nudity and sexual interaction with each other had left Alexander a seriously confused boy and he spent most of his early life collapsing underneath nature. His image of what was sexually intoxicating had been extrapolated by an outdated sense of exploration and it wasn’t until a blade was taken to his hair for the first time that he discovered his somewhat camp fantasy.

Hair down past his kneecaps, he strode into the hairdresser with the same fear a dog gets when being taken to the vet, the knowledge of heading into unfamiliar territory with a destination filled with pain and cowardice. A woman named Sandy greeted him with a shallow smile. ‘She looks like an obese barbie’ he thought as he studied her bleach blond beach hair, black eyebrows, tattooed neck and her stretched lobes. She told him to take a seat in a leather chair that smelled like a fresh mop bucket and asked his mother how she wanted it done. “He is going to a catholic school,” she cawed, “so he needs his hair short, back and sides.”
“One blade it is then, now don’t move little girl or you might lose an ear” she lovingly stated as she started spraying his knotted hair, wetting it with a spray bottle that chilled his neck.

Alexander had been shocked, the way her nailed hands caressed his neck and scalp was invigorating and he soon found he had an erection. This wasn’t just any erection that was hidden beneath the rather thin sheet; it was the sexually frustrated feeling that thrust his boyhood into the world, discarding his innocence along. When she took scissors to his hair: the more she lobbed off the better he would feel. More and more hair fell from his head and he began to feel his first climax. As the last of his hair was modelled on his head with an electric razor he felt sweet relief and bliss. The virgin orgasm was almost a twisted version of the virgin birth. Without sexual contact Alexander was launched into his adult life.

Throughout his teens Alexander would go every month to a hairdresser to find his relief. Always hiding under those sheets his mother always wondered why he felt such a need to be so clean cut. As he entered adulthood his guilty secret matured with age.  No longer a virgin of a women’s touch, he had still found nothing quite like the sensual blessing his haircut created within him. He discovered late in his teens that you were meant to masturbate to cause yourself to cum. The need was lessened, but it never quite ruled it out indefinitely.

He went once a year, preserving his hair for that one fix. Letting it grow long and dishevelled; his mother was always proud to see his hair combed back. It was his twenty-first when he decided to extend his pleasure and combine masturbation with his fixation.

He was seated in that leather chair that smells of soap and she asked “how would you like it?” He peered at her reflection in the mirror and pondered her question, “Short, back and sides.” He said.

“One blade it is then, now don’t move or you might lose an ear.”

She started spraying his hair and the arousal began. He closed his eyes and stifled a groan. “O god,” he whispered to himself. Quickly she chipped away at his hair, cuttiing lengths off and speedily dropping them to the floor. His erection grew under the cover and he gradually began to shake. His hand worked up and down his shaft as he tried to keep his face imperceptibly calm. Faster and faster she worked, not noticing that faster and faster he worked, and as she cut around his ears he couldn’t hold it any longer. He came and in that moment he did what he never done in that situation before, he jerked his head.

He felt a painful slash across his ear and he heard the woman behind him scream. Blood pumped from his ear. He looked around to the floor and saw a gnarled piece of cartilage and skin sitting atop a bed of his hair. Looking back at the mirror he saw why she was screaming. A pair of scissors was embedded into his scalp. It drooped to the side, making it look like a piece of seaweed was stuck in his hair.

He was losing consciousness as the blood pumped down the side of his face, onto the cover and slowly pooled around his crouch. Before he fainted he turned the leather chair to the woman. She was rushing back with towels and a shocked look. He studied her bleach blond hair and black eyebrows, her tattooed neck and her stretched lobes, he thought, “Stupid woman; I wanted short, back and sides.”